02.21.05
duhdhee ko
sooper baduy twag ko nho. pero miss ko na duhdhee ko. im thinking positive right now. was urged i guess to write something nice about him. he is the love of my life. though, we are not actuallty together and i lost him already (but not totally ah) he is my love. his my companion. he’s been there for me. he stood by me. he kept me. he made me feel special. nothing compares to what he made me feel about myself. he is so honest, that’s why i am still hurting. he is more mature than me. he is my sooper friend. he is my ultimate crush. he goes to church with me, @ our church. he accepted me wholeheartedly,though he hates my pasaway ugali. he makes me smile. he loves jollibee’s burger steak,whether it be 1pc or 2pc bsta with extra rice. he once or thrice told me that i am his burger steak and i told him that he is my tocino. haha. corny namin. most of all, he also loves my God. those are few of my memories with him. i’d still smile thinking of it. i had so much fun. still im blessed for still having him,though things are different now.
dennis and me are not really bf-gf. we shared a mutual feeling. we decided not to commit for real for certain reasons:
1. i am not allowed to have a bf yet.
2. we have priorities, far more important from really being together.
3. we already enjoy what we have and we are really thankful to Him.
4. we believe that if it is God’s will that we wud be together, then let His will be done.
5. we will wait and pray.
i guess, that would give everybody who knows us that clearer picture of me and him. things changed. we became bestfriends. haha. too weird,actually too normal. its a long story. private. im still hurting. im too dramatic. we still share this mutual feeling but decided to give some time for ourselves. to give space. to give a break for certain reasons. painful ones. it is God’s will, im still thankful to him and to Him. they both made me realize many things in my life. more important things. i know God has a purpose for this. though im still hurting, i know it’ll be gone soon. ill be ok. we will be ok. but now, i have to pray. pray hard. everyday, thinking of what happened gives me more pain. i have to pray really hard. He’s my strength. He’s my rock. He’s my fortress. He is the real love of my life.